Terrified

I'm terrified of spiders

They're nasty, creepy creatures

That make my skin crawl

It doesn't matter how big the spider is

As long as it has eight legs

And a bunch of ugly eyes

I'll be running away screaming

You know what also freaks me out

Birds

I know, ridiculous, but have you ever been attacked by birds

Five hawks

Three chickens

A parrot

A swan

And even a pigeon flew at me once

It freaks me out

There's another thing that scares me

Death

What happens when we die

Is our existence really only limited to the few years we have on Earth

When we die, will it actually be anything

Or will everything be gone

Of course, if that's true

We would never know

Because we would be a part of that never-ending blackness

A few lines from a song I love go like this

"I admit that it’s difficult to think about

I think everybody got a little bit of doubt

You don’t get to hide from it even if you shout

Not a soul on the planet gets to wiggle out"

Death is inevitable

I believe that our existence is too intricate to mean nothing in the scheme of things

There has to be something other than eternal nothingness after we die

But I have time before that happens

Or do I

We never know when the time is gonna come

I could drive home today after school and be hit be a semi

Crushed on impact

A man with a gun could try and rob my family

And decide it's best not to leave any witnesses

The struggle of not knowing is the most difficult thing to ever experience

I try to keep a strong face about this

Because I know others who have this fear worse than me

But is there really a way to measure the fear of the end

I block the concept from my mind

Trying to live in the moment

Typing on a keyboard the thoughts I try so desperately to ignore

I'm terrified

Seventeen years old

The average life span for a male in America is seventy-eight

Sixty-one years until I reach that point

That seems like forever, but it really isn't

1. College
2. Career
3. Marriage
4. Children
5. Retirement
6. Nursing Home
7. Coffin

All the major milestones I have left

All in seven steps

When life is categorized in milestones

Time is shorter than I could ever imagine

I joke about death

All so I don't take it too seriously

The day I was told that everybody is going to die

I cried and begged for it not to be true

A little kid wanting life to go on forever

I sit here today remembering that day

Because sometimes

I still feel like that kid